I received a note fom Andy today – I guess that’s what he was trying to say last night but I was too involved in myself to let him speak. I’ve written him a reply – saying it wasn’t him – just me being stupid and no one hates him (I only told Helen T) especially not me – at least you didn’t go along just for the sake of it, please speak to me after this at Farwell’s party, feel free to phone, and all stuff like that. My reply was longer than his note. Daniel gave it me in the dinner hour and I’m sure him and his mates read it cos he wanted to read my reply – but I just told him, as I had sellotaped it up and put a sarky commecnt on the back. I know he’ll have told Rhon and she’ll tell Jo and Sam and Rach, but if Andy says anything I can definitely say I only told Helen T. I think he’s right really, and I don;t think it would’ve worked out, I was just clutching at straws as I haven’t been out with someone for such a long time. I suppose my time will come, but it’s difficult waiting for it. I’ll just put this episode down to experince and who knows, if he goes to Farwell’s party – something may happen there – but I’m not going to think about that as I doubt if he’ll go now, cos he’ll want to avoid me and Anj, but I don’t think she’ll be attending. Jenny and Kati and Anj and Nat are really going off.
I can’t go on SAturday, I’ve just found out that I have to stay at my grandparents’ house. I don’t think it would have worked out anyway. I’m sorry if I led you on, but I don’t think there is anything between us. I know you and your friends will probably hate me now, but you did want me to say what my true feelings were.
Andrew – x-
My letter to Andy (the rough copy so the one to him was neat!)
Thank you for your note and for saying what you really feel/think/whatever. I don’t think you led me on at all, it was all me being stupid. I hope even after this we won’t ignore each other because that’s stupid silly really and it would be really difficult at Farwell’s ‘party’ – if you’re going of course. I hope if I do see you around – as I expect I will – you won’t mind talking to me. I was planning on phoning you with this stuff – but it would have been really ‘stilted’ and you might have thought I was trying to force you into something you didn’t want (which I’m not).
Anyway – if there’s anything else you can think of to say – you’ve got my phone number. If you’re worried about every anyone hating you – they don’t. I haven’s told anyone except Hele and she doesn’t think badly of you nor do I.I’m glad you didn’t go along with me, just for the sake of it.
See you around